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Quandary

I have written two versions of the same story for submission. 

To make it a bit different, in the second version I have opened the story with the aftermath of the event and then ended the story with what came before. This second part (i.e. what came before) is definitely more visual and hard-hitting than the first, but I wonder if I am shooting myself in the foot leaving the best 'til last as they might not read on that far! On the plus side, I think it's more interesting to end with the shocker.

I really have no idea which version to submit. 

Any preferences to how a story unfolds?

Comments

  • Depends on where it's going and the target audience.
  • It's for a flash comp, so no specific audience to target.
  • I think if you doubt that they won't read that far, that the story isn't intriguing enough. Could you put foreshadowing in?
  • I like the idea of the reverse chron but it does depend on the story content.
  • febes said:
    I think if you doubt that they won't read that far, that the story isn't intriguing enough. Could you put foreshadowing in?
    The two halves are linked, so, yes, there are nods to the fact that something has happened. I do think that there is enough there to arouse intrigue. 
    Because of the nature of the event, however, in the second part (i.e. that would have chronologically happened first!), the language is more powerful.

    I need to keep going back to them both and reading afresh, I think!
    heather said:
    I like the idea of the reverse chron but it does depend on the story content.

    That fills me with hope!
  • Take a chance and send the story feet first. If you don't win reverse the order of events and enter another competition.
  • Opening with the aftermath and then telling the story in flashback worked brilliantly in Reservoir Dogs because right from the start you wanted to know how they had got themselves into their predicament.
  • Agreed.  I used that tactic once - one long flashback, that is. The aftermath hooks people in but you do have to go back briefly to the beginning at the end, in order to remind the reader of the consequences.  I'm reminded of "Columbo" on T.V.  You knew from the start whodunnit but that didn't spoil things, as the rest was about the character and cleverness of Columbo and how he exposed the perpetrator.
  • "The Girl in Red" Also uses flashbacks. It starts with Red in the aftermath, then has regular 'reminiscences' of the life before. There was a hint at the life before in the opening though. I'm not sure I would have been bothered much about the story if there hadn't been a hint at the catastrophe that Red had endured.
  • Yes, it can work well. I have decided, though, to go with the straightforward version!
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