Modern etiquette when introducing people to each other

brownfox

brownfox

Can anyone help with current practice when introducing people to each other at a social occasion (not work related).  I tend to point to one person, say their full name, then repeat the procedure with the other, then say something brief about what they either do for a living or are interested in, eg.  Matilda Parsons, William Bloggs.  Matilda is a primary school teacher and William writes poetry.  At a recent 'do' I went to, I found I and others were being introduced by first name only, no surname.  I didn't find this adequate.  Am I out of date?

Schumi

I don't think you're out of date. I wouldn't change the way you introduce people. After all, there might be more than one Sarah if you know what I mean.

To know a person's surname is just as relevant to me as knowing their forename.

Carol

Sounds fine to me. I think it's a bit presumptive to just introduce strangers by their first name only.

Allie

Yes, I agree. The only thing is, sometimes names slip people's minds, and they do their best not to let on for fear of insulting the two people they are introducing to each other. I speak from personal experience, of course. :)

Marc.B

I usually stick to forenames as I tend to forget surnames. I tried using the link-word method once until I introduced someone whose name was Dave Codd as Dave Fish. Trouble was, he didn't see the funny side. First names only from then on, if I can remember them as well. I do resent when people ask you 'and what is your Christian name?'  'I'm Jewish' being my reply.

Tessa Tangent

What about my method?  Hello, Wilma, this is Fred, he's here with the reading project. Fred, Wilma's the project co-ordinator. 

I don't tend to introduce anyone who really won't get on or are totally unrelated.

A simple one of mine is telling the person you're introducing to BillyNoMates that you know him through "xxx" and so they may have things to talk about (and then gaily leave them TO it!  Come on, if they're in a reasonable job, it should be a doddle for them). 

Oh, honestly, this should be simple.  Is it a terribly tragic problem?  Should we ask the Times to hold the front page about it??  I don't think so.

Probably, the secret is to, hey, relax !! :O) !!!!

montholon

I have a dreadful habit of forgetting the names of people I'm supposed to know.  Sometimes I've even resorted to saying, 'Why don't you two introduce yourselves to each other while I get us all another drink?'  It can get expensive, though, so I really must try harder.

Mike Coombes

Socially i introduce people by first names, in business by full name.

My biggest blunder? I took a girl out for the first time, went to the pub (stopping on the way to 'cement' our relationship) where a friend approached and said "Aren't you going to introduce me to the young lady?"

I realised to my absolute horror that I couldn't remember her name.

Can't have been too bad though, we've been married 21 years now.

dorothyd

Mike, that's a great story!
I was just saying to my partner yesterday that my mother was one of the most travelsick prone people in the world. Look at a car, feel sick, that kind of thing.
We had been to the cinema in Bilbao, (Northern Spain) travelled the short distance home, she rushed to the bathroom to be sick. My father looked at me and said "the first time I took your mother out on a date, she was sick all over the top of the Green Line bus."
I said, "why did you date her again, then?"
He said "God knows, she's been doing it ever since!"

Betsie

I like the way you do things Bronwfox.  Let's hang on to the niceties.  I think there is also a correct pecking order when introducing people, you announce a woman's name first if introducing to a bloke and the same with say, older person to younger person.  If I've forgotten anyone's name (which I do frequently) I just own up and say, 'I'm sorry I've forgotten your name'. 

Jenny

I've had occasional conversations with people where I couldn't remember their names or where I knew them from.

Asking general questions (eg 'How are things?') sometimes provides the answers.

I'm still not convinced that the woman I once had a lovely chat with at the supermarket was who I thought she was!

brownfox

Could I say a big thank you to everyone who's taken the trouble to reply!  There's obviously no set way of doing things and I think I'll carry on as I have been doing.  If  I try to do things differently now, I'll only end up getting muddled up.